Lint Goes Literary!

An updated version of the book and film classic!

IT MUST BE HILLARY CLINTON! I mean, "Lint"on

Well, it could be.

Right?

I must say, this lint person had me stumped at first, but I'm pretty sure it's Hillary Clinton. The hairstyle, the clothes - it's got to be her.

Either that, or my Aunt Beulah. Oh, wait. I don't have an Aunt Beulah.

So it's Hillary "Lint"on for sure.

AMAZING! It's "Lint" Eastwood! ! ! Made my day!

Well. Just when I think it's safe to clean the lint screen, this is what happens. I don't know about you, but I'm almost expecting it to say something about making his day.

But I'm hoping that these lint people don't start talking to me. That would be a bit over the top.

Land of Lost Socks

My husband of the theory of lost socks (see sidebar) found this T-Shirt for me on Shirt Woot. (Great site, different T-Shirt each day) This just may explain where all the socks go once they leave your house. You can see the vortex at the top where they come down and join the fun. No wonder they disappear!

Marilyn Monroe!

WOW! It must be MARILYN MONROE! I thought nothing could top seeing Jay Leno (because Jay Leno is great!) or that French philosopher in my lint, so this was a surprise! Are my missing socks really being ground up into celebrities, philosophers and Tonight Show hosts?*

In any case, this one’s for sale. Click here if you want to get your very own Mari"lint" Monroe!

If you just want to navigate off this page into something completely normal and not bordering on the questionable at all, click here.**

*Rhetorical question. Do not answer.

**Good luck with that.Seriously, you should know me better by now.

AMAZING! Michel Foucault Lint Found in Texas dryer

Who knew.

If the face of a French philosopher (1926-1984) had to appear in the lint in someone's dryer, I guess it's better that it's mine.

Someone else might think it looked like Mr. Potato Head's more intellectual relative and leave it at that.

But no, I'd recognize that direct, discerning stare anywhere.

This one's not for sale - I'm sending it to my cousin who appreciates controversial French philosophers.

Don't you, Judy?

Make Your Own Lint Person Kit

Ever wonder if you could make your own lint person?
GOOD NEWS! You certainly can! Just click on the link below to get your very Make Your Own Lint Person Kit.

Each kit includes:

• Fresh Dryer Lint
  
• Authentic Googly eyes
• Special clear container originally meant to hold a golf ball but works just as well for lint people
  
• lots of other things (some not shown)

Of course, you can use your own lint, but I have a wide variety, including soft, clean various colored lint from my mother's dryer, as well as scary, dirty lint with dog, cat and human hair interspersed with dust mite remains and assorted allergens, both seen and unseen.

And all for a reasonable price, plus only slightly outrageous shipping and handling fees.

So, go ahead, get yours today!

THANKS! WHAT A GREAT IDEA!

No, thanks, I'm really in the mood for something not lint like.

Socks Without Mates Basket

GOOD NEWS! Socks without mates now offered in bulk. Twenty plus socks, HUGE variety, and price includes basket! If you don't find a match among your socks, they also make great sock puppets (accessories not included.)

If interested, click here

If not, try this instead!

Flower Girl Sock

Okay, technically it should read girl's flower sock, or sock with flowers, since no bride would allow this to be worn at a wedding. No offense to the perfectly nice sock. Looks like a pre-teen girl's sock, black, with little flowers embroidered on it. Mateless. Has been for a quite awhile, since I think my youngest outgrew this several years ago.

If you've got a match click here.

Otherwise, you might be interested in this.

Or not.

WOW! JAY LENO LINT FROM MY MISSING SOCKS!

• Copy of JAY LENO LINT!
  
• I COULDN'T BELIEVE MY EYES!
  
• I cleaned the lint from my dryer (which is probably from all those ground up missing socks) and found a ball of lint that looked exactly like Jay Leno!
  
• What a find!
• Original bought by the Jimmy Kimmel Show, but not shown on TV- darn it!
• Don't worry, you too can get your own copy of Jay Leno Lint.
  
• Click here for your own Jay Leno Lint.
• Click here for something else.

If missing socks turn into lint, then lint turns into

Queen of the Lint

Imagine my surprise! The Queen of the Lint emerged from my lint screen on August 20, 2008!* She's shown here with her crown and royal robe collar. And she can be all yours!
All your lint dreams and aspirations can come true.

YES! I'll pay any price...well, almost.
No thanks. What else you got?


*Queen of the Lint is probably
made from ground up socks in the dryer,
if you believe Carla's Theory #4

Nice single dress sock seeks mate

• I am an attractive, black sock.
  
• I am on the dressy side.
  
• I love to take walks.
  
• I like the better kind of casual dress, or formal shoes.
• I still have a lot of elastic left at the top and there are no holes in my toes or heels.
  
• I am a morning, noon and night sock. Is there another out there, just like me? Anywhere? What about another, fairly similar?
  
• Mens, Size 9-11. Over the calf.
• Give me a chance!
• No thanks, I'm looking for something else.
  

1 is the Loneliest Number

SUCCESS STORY!

Grey Tube Sock is not alone anymore! It waited patiently for its partner, and now, thanks to the internet, a compassionate surfer (of the internet ) and the US mail, it will now spend the rest of its natural (or unnatural for that matter) life as a duo. Thank you so much!




1 is the loneliest number - at least, that's what Grey Tube Sock with red elastic thingy at the top thinks. (One size appears to fit all, androgynously). No fool in the numbers game, it knows something is missing. Moreover, it knows what that something is. So please, please internet audience, help this lonely sock find its mate.

For another possible success story, completely unrelated to socks, click here

Beige Beauty Begs for Buddy!

HAPPILY EVER AFTER STORY! Beige beauty is on her way to a complete life on the west coast! She can't believe her luck and good fortune!

This old sock has plenty of life left in it, but it needs another like it to make its life complete.

• Size 6 or 7
• Women's
  
• Elastic intact
• A good wash should take out the sole stains.
• Since this one is taken, what can I look forward to?
  

Size 5, Women's/Young Lady's, Comfy and Orangey pink?

What can we say, except - why wait for winter to find a mate for this one?
Stylish, comfortable and barely worn.
Its mate has to be out there somewhere.
It just has to.

If you have the mate, or even if you don't and would like to give this sock a home, please click the link below.

Yes! I want this sock! Can't live without it!

Napoleon Dynamite Sock is Lonely!

• Don't let its youthful appearance fool you! This sock has been around.
  
• Green, pink, blue and brown plaid
• Size 5-7?
  
• Looks like a girl's sock, but who knows. Guys like Napoleon too. He's Dynamite.
• Click this link if you're interested in getting together.
  
• Non-matching socks welcome to buy.
  

Single, White Low Cut Seeks Sole Mate

• Single, White Low Cut Androgynous sock.
  
• Grey and yellow accents.
  
• "Large" and what looks like a letter "G" printed on sole of sock.
  
• Excellent, like new condition.
  
• Seeks mate with similar characteristics.
  
• Probably size 9-11.
  
• If interested, only $1.00.

Single Plaid Men's Size 9-11

• Single, grey, brown and black plaid men's sock, size 9-11 looking for mate.
  
• Slightly worn heel.
  
• If you match description (or even if you don't), I'm yours for $1.00 plus shipping and handling.